Jumpin' Jack
by Aussie73
Summary: After Sam meets an AU Sam, she decides to tackle her troubled relationship with Jack. Spoilers for Ripple Effect. Sexual content, but not graphic.


_Just a little piece of nonsense. Bit of a smut-fic, but nothing graphic. (Blushes). Takes place during and after 'Ripple Effect'. Is also another take on Sam's "not exactly" comment during 'Ex Deus Machina'. Still haven't seen S9 (hangs head in apology for any mistakes), but the first four eps are out on DVD at the end of this month. Hurray!_

* * *

Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter couldn't have been less surprised. 

Not for one second.

Of all the alternate Sams she'd met so far, all but two of them were involved with a certain Jack O'Neill.

Just her and a rather disturbing Marine Corps Carter were not.

And even the Marine had had a fling with him.

So … technically … it was just her.

Technically.

They'd tried so hard.

Or at least he had.

But it had been … weird.

They'd spent too many years denying their attraction, stomping vigorously on the little flares of tenderness, desire. And now it seemed they'd truly killed things between them.

Or, rather, she had.

They hadn't seen each other since she'd come back to the SGC and had only talked once on the phone. They'd argued bitterly and Jack had told her that he'd waited a long time for her, that he wasn't going to let her fears cripple them.

And he was right. She was afraid.

Afraid that if they got together properly, they wouldn't last. She'd never been very successful in her relationships.

Jonas – control freak who'd died.

Narim – gentle kind alien who'd … died.

Martouf – gentle kind alien who'd … also died.

Pete – good kind man. Had made her smile. She'd cared for him, had even loved him. But not enough. All because she couldn't let go of the strange bond she had with her enigmatic CO.

"Ah … Colonel Carter?"

Carter blinked back to her surroundings and saw one of the other Sams come into her lab. "Hi," she said.

"So …" – #2 waved a hand around – "bit of a cliché, this, isn't it?" She accompanied the statement with a waggle of her eyebrows.

Carter chuckled. "Just a bit," she replied. She looked at the other Sam. She noted the longer hair, the rounded figure – much more so than her own long thin body – and the wedding ring. Married. "So … you're married to General O'Neill."

#2 smiled. "I can't say I think of him like that anymore, but yes," she said. "We've been together nearly five years now." Her smile faltered. "I just … want to get back to them."

"Them?"

"Our kids." The woman smiled radiantly – Carter couldn't remember the last time she had been so happy. "Two of them now." She rested her hand low on her abdomen. "And a bump."

Wow. Three kids. Carter couldn't even imagine having one child. Perhaps a long time ago till she'd decided to set her sights on the unattainable. "Congratulations," she said.

"So … what about you?" #2 said, settling down into the settee and hugging a pillow up against her chest.

"Me?"

"Are you married, seeing anyone?" #2 grinned. "I've never met an AU version of myself – kind of makes me wonder."

"I'm … not with anyone … not exactly," Carter replied.

"Not exactly?" And the Jack O'Neill eyebrow-waggle appeared again. "Intriguing."

"Not really," Carter said, sighing.

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Sam O'Neill looked at her alternate self and saw the deep unhappiness in the woman's fair features.

Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter – and that was a strange notion to the former Air Force Officer – was wound tighter than Sam herself had been in a long time. "Not really?" She leaned over to the small fridge in the Colonel's lab and snagged a diet soda. "You and Jack …?"

The Colonel sighed again. "We tried," she admitted, "but it was weird."

"Weird?" Sam frowned. What on Earth – or any other planet, for that matter – could be weird about being with Jack O'Neill? He could be rude, tactless, bullish and pig-headed, yet he was also caring, tender, and sweet. _And let's not forget one sweet ride!_, her evil fairies reminded her.

_Yeah, yeah_, she admitted. She wondered briefly if the Colonel had any evil fairies or whether she really was as uptight as she seemed.

"We were CO and 2IC for so long, we couldn't seem to step out of those roles," the Colonel said. "Well, that's not fair – it was more me than him," she admitted.

"Ah." Sam could kind of understand why the Colonel was worried – as one of only a few female Lieutenant Colonels on a battle-ready unit, she had to be worried that people would think she'd slept her way up the ranks. Sam grimaced – it seemed the good ol' boy network was alive and kicking in this reality too.

She opened her soda and took a swig, grimacing at the taste. She wasn't that keen on the stuff anymore – had picked up Jack's sweet tooth over the last few years – but it was cold and wet. "So I guess you were in the same chain of command a lot longer than Jack and I were," she offered.

The Colonel blinked. "You were Air Force, too?"

Sam laughed and looked down at her curvy figure, contrasting it with the Colonel's slim, battle-ready one. "Hard to believe, isn't it? But that's what having three kids and living with the connoisseur of all things cake will do to a girl's figure."

The Colonel returned the laugh. "The General always did like his cake," she said fondly.

"Jack," Sam said.

The Colonel frowned. "What?"

"No wonder you're having problems. You can't even say his name," Sam pointed out.

"Fine. Jack loves cake," the Colonel replied snippily. Then she sighed. "God … this is a weird thing to be talking about."

"Who knows you better than another you?" Sam said. "It's a shame about you and your Jack though – you're missing out on some pretty great sex." She gave a wicked grin.

"There's more to life than sex," the Colonel said primly.

Damn; had Sam ever been this uptight?

"True," Sam said, "but sex with Jack O'Neill … mmmmm. True; I don't have anyone to compare him with, but the things that man can do."

The Colonel went an interesting pink, then her mouth dropped open. "The General … uh, Jack … was your first?"

"Yeah," Sam replied. "Who was yours?"

"Tom Fischer, sophomore year at college," the Colonel said. "I … Jack was your first?"

Sam shrugged. "What can I say? I was a late bloomer, but" – she grinned again – "I've certainly made up for lost time."

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"Really?" Carter was intrigued. She'd certainly wondered to herself about the General's prowess, and the few kisses they'd shared had definitely made her tingle. "Do I want to know?"

"Oh, yeah …," #2 purred, stretching luxuriantly. "Have you even seen him naked yet?"

"Ah … no," Carter replied.

"I've never seen your Jack, but my Jack … Well, Major General Jack O'Neill is a silver fox with broad shoulders, gorgeous chest, bitable stomach and an ass to die for," #2 told her. "He's still on active duty and running the colony and dashing round after the twins has kept him F-I-T."

"Colony?" Carter was intrigued and tried desperately not to visualize the Jack just portrayed. "So, you've done that in your reality. Colonized space?"

"Well, it's not exactly space, but yes, we set up a colony nearly six years ago now on P2Z 724. We call it Haven."

"Nice," Carter replied, remembering a recent mission to that planet. "I guess in your reality it's not a dust-ball."

"No," #2 replied. "It's gorgeous. I wish I had some pictures, but I wasn't exactly expecting to go reality-hopping." Then she wagged her finger at Carter. "Anyway, I'm supposed to be telling you about the sarcastic, infuriating, smug sex machine that is Jack O'Neill."

Sex machine? Oh, brother!

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**Several days later:**

Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter peered through her microscope at a new soil sample, but her thoughts were anything but focused on the task at hand.

Ever since that strange encounter with all the other Sams – and one Sam in particular – she'd been thinking a lot about the painful abortive relationship she'd had with General O'Neill.

_Oh God, even in your own head, you're thinking of him as General O'Neill!_, she scolded herself. _His name is Jack. Get that? Jack._

Some of the things AU Sam had told her had made her envious, and rather … ahem … horny. And she couldn't help but wonder whether this Jack O'Neill had similar likes and dislikes – and technique.

Did he like his scars to be kissed?

His neck to be nibbled?

_Such a nice neck, too!_

His butt to be spanked?

_Nice butt also! Tight, round and firm._

Carter tried to wave off the voice whispering evil things in her ears, but felt a deep throb low down and clenched her thighs together to ease the tension.

And the voice continued whispering things to her:

_Is he good with his fingers?_

_His lips?_

_His tongue?_

_His teeth?_

_Could he make you scream?_

She throbbed again, and was surprised. She knew he was a great kisser and she loved the feel of his soft lips on her neck, but they'd never gotten much further than that. But now her imagination was running wild.

Sam Carter was not a loud lover. She enjoyed men and she enjoyed sex, all true, but had never really pegged herself as the noisy type. But if her Jack was the same as #2's Jack, it would seem he could have her screaming her over-educated head off.

_So … what're you waiting for?_, the voice taunted. _Take some of that leave you've got stock-piled, and go jump the man's bones!_

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**Arlington, Virginia:**

Sam stepped out of the cab and pulled the skirt of her dress straight with anxious fingers. _Come on, Sam; you can do this!_, she told herself. It had been a long time since she'd felt anxiety about sex, but Jack was so different to any of the men she'd been with previously.

Which facet of his personality would be dominant?

Would he be intense and serious?

Or would he be flirty and playful?

Did he like to be in control?

Or did he like to go with the flow?

AU Sam had said that she and her Jack spent as much time laughing during sex as loving – wrestling matches, naughty talk, cheerful insults – but AU Jack seemed a lot happier than Sam's Jack. Although he'd also lost his son, he'd gotten a second chance at family – first of all with the colony, and then with AU Sam.

One thing Sam knew; Jack O'Neill was simply made for fatherhood. She'd never seen anything like the way kids reacted to him – it was like he was catnip. Yet he didn't seem to make any special effort – they just seemed to know instinctively that he was a great Dad.

Even when Cassie had hated adults during her mid-teens, she'd still respected and loved Jack. He'd been the only one able to get through to her at times.

_Quit stalling, and get your ass in there!_, that evil voice prodded.

Digging in her purse, Sam found the key Jack had given her a few months ago and let herself into the house. "Jack?" she called, pleased that her voice didn't quaver.

No response.

Crap. Maybe he wasn't home. He had horrible hours at the Pentagon, but his aide had assured her that he'd been off today.

She put her purse neatly on the entrance table and hung up her jacket. She looked at herself in the mirror, eyeing the newly cut blonde hair, the old rose of her dress giving her pale skin an unfamiliar glow.

Or was that anticipation?

After all, it had been a while since the last time she'd had sex, and she was a normal healthy woman. She had needs.

She moved through the passageway, noting some additions to the place. It seemed that Jack had finally settled in here, stamping the small house with his own self-admitted warped personality.

A hockey stick on one wall.

A picture of Homer Simpson on the other – how old was the man again?

His surprisingly extensive book collection took up two thirds of the long passageway – and she knew he had more in the living room. She'd always known he was way more intelligent than he acted, but she'd been surprised to see how eclectic his collection was.

Sun Tzu's "The Art Of War".

Homer's "The Odyssey" – in the original Greek. Turns out the man had a Masters in Classics.

Several books by Steven Hawking – with notes based on Sam's mission reports in the margins. All those years of feigning inattention were belied by the insight shown in his notes.

Then there was the lighter reading.

"Archie" comics.

"Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy". Hah; busted, Mister-I-Hate-Science-Fiction!

And of course the many Simpsons annuals.

A door opened and steam billowed out, followed by Jack O'Neill.

Naked as the day he was born and dabbing a towel to his face.

Oh.

My.

Freakin'.

God.

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Sam just stared.

She didn't know if it was possible for a man to be beautiful, but if it was, then Jack O'Neill certainly merited the word.

Just as tall as she remembered, silver hair as mad as ever, but he seemed to have lost some weight since she'd last seen him.

Pretty weird given his age, his appetite and a desk job.

But, hey, she was so not complaining!

Tanned skin, broad shoulders, firm lightly-haired chest shining damply from the shower, a lucky rivulet of water making its way down a newly-flat stomach to …

"Holy … buckets," Sam finally croaked.

Jack whipped his towel away from his head. "Sam?" he yelped.

"Uh … hi," she said, unable to draw her attention from the impressive piece of equipment he sported – and which was now showing a definite sign of interest.

And to think she'd thought this dress might be too low-cut!

An unmistakable snicker came from Jack, and she moved her eyes up to his face, going red as he casually rubbed at his head with the towel. The man was absolutely shameless. "Like whatcha see there, Carter?" he taunted.

_Must. Not. Blush. Again._

"Uhh … yes, sir!" she said.

Then blushed again as she realized what she'd said.

And the man snickered again.

_Must. Not. Shoot. Major. General. Bad. For. Career._

"Sweeeet," he said. He wrapped the towel around his waist …

_Spoilsport!_, the evil voice in her mind complained

… and came over to her. "What are you doing here, Sam?" he asked, taking her arm gently and leading her into the kitchen.

Sam sighed blissfully as the silver Adonis leaned into his fridge to retrieve two Michelobs. One of his favorite expressions was 'Peachy' – did he realize that it described his firm taut ass to a tee? "Ah … uhm …". She sighed again and decided to just spit it out.

"I came to jump you," she declared.

* * *

_The story endeth here for this site, as I don't want my membership to be revoked or to offend people. For anyone who wants the … ahem … adult version, go to www sjnc17.stargate-brats net. (Put dots in place of the spaces)_

_Also: some might say Jack forgave Sam very easily for her dithering and angsting, but that talk will be coming up after the aforementioned adult chapter. May post the talk chapter to this version also, depending on how well this is received._

_An anonymous reviewer picked up on the fact that I originally said "Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Universe" rather than Galaxy. Whoops! This has now been corrected, and thanks go to him or her for the eagle eyes._


End file.
